Guest Post: TLC Gold

This post is brought to you by my friend Ems.  She doesn’t have a blog of her own, but her take on early 90’s culture frequently blows my mind.  Plus, she is giving me a ride home from the bachelorette party tonight, so she’s an automatic winner.

I’m a Snatch fan. In fact, I think Guy Richie is a genius, it’s like he knows how my mind works. So when I was visiting a friend who has TLC last weekend, we stumbled across absolute amazingness on television—My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding. For those of you that don’t see the connection between the two, let me help you out. Brad Pitt. You’re on your own from there.

Needless to say, this show is absolutely awesome and horrible at the same time, but what would reality tv be if not both of those? The basic idea of the show is to show the marital practices of the Traveler/Irish Gypsy communities in the UK. Complete with 14 year old engagements, 16 year old weddings, dresses that weigh 100 lbs, more tulle than you can imagine, and Christmas lights being used where Christmas light designers never imagined they would be used. You think that’s not cool enough to keep you intrigued? Once again they have met that need. They even show you the interworkings of first communion craziness. Including eight year olds that look like mini-Disney princesses in gowns you only wish you could have worn for Halloween at that age.

It makes me enjoy caravans and the accents even more when I watch Snatch now.

-Ems

Secrets of a Tween

Hello team,

I have a confession.  I’m not proud of it, but I have watched the first three Twilight movies (for the first time) in less than a week.

I fear that I cannot stop.

Jonathan even admitted that he knew why 12 year old girls loved it…Jacob’s exposed chest.  🙂

Chesticles

Jonathan also pointed out this little bit of awesome:

Jacob is an alpaca

They aren’t good!  The dialogue is predictable and delivered in monotone voices.  Bella and Edward are less emotive than my box of sod.  But they are ADDICTING!!  I crave that bad acting and the obvious CG special effects.  I have even been staying up hours past bed time!

Have you seen them?  What’s your latest guilty pleasure?

In case you were wondering, I’m totally on Team Edward.  But I think the real question is now: are you on Team Jacob or Team Alpaca?

I hope you still read my blog after this post.

-Mads

Bye bye Hollywood

I NEED to catch up on Dexter, this is just a fact of life. So I strolled by the Hollywood video by my work: CLOSED. Whatevs, college kids either drink or study too hard to rent movies anyway. Then tonight I thought I’d try the movie store by my house: Store CLOSING! Everything must go!

I chatted up the snaggle-tooth salesman long enough to find out that Hollywood Video in Minnesota is a thing of the past. Duluth might have a store open for a bit longer, but that’s it. Then I asked if Blockbuster is pretty much the only video store left. His reply? “Not for much longer…9 of their locations have closed too.”

I am not terribly surprised by this because we live in a world where you can Netflix, Redbox, or thieve any movie you care to watch. One thing I can’t figure out is how to rent television series.

I don’t know about you, but when I am watching a tv show, I like to rent it and watch it marathon-style until my eyes bug out of my head. As far as I know, Redbox doesn’t have tv rentals and Netflix only allows for 1 disc at a time (if you are on the cheapo plan like me). Most discs have 3-ish episodes on them…that is just NOT enough!

Without movie stores, I am forced to either buy the tv series or reduce myself to stealing. Do I up my monthly Netflix payments for the sole purpose of television rentals? Or do I spend mucho cash on series that I really love? Or do I give up my scruples and just steal, steal, steal?

I guess only time will tell.

-M

Man/Woman vs. Food

As a self-proclaimed foodie and advocate of foodporn, foodblogs, recipe exchanges, potlucks, etc., it seems only reasonable that I would love a show dedicated to watching a chubby dude stuff his face. In fact, it is more than reasonable, it is fabulous!
Man vs. Food takes the repulsive tradition of eating contests and glorifies it into a mouth-watering 30 minutes of hilarity. I dare you to watch it without drooling and gagging…all at the same wonderful time.

All that hot mess seems like it can’t be real and it certainly doesn’t happen to normal people. Well I am here to tell you, IT DOES!

A dear friend recently attempted this:

That’s a 12 ounce ball of dough for the bun, a massive amount of meat, tons of other burger toppings, 2 cups of rice and beans, 6 wings, and a beer in 30 minutes. I am impressed by the sheer fact that she was the only woman to compete out of 70 people. Wha wha wha?!? Insane and totally awesome.
She didn’t make it and she ended up puking a lot, but what I wouldn’t give to have witnessed that face-shoveling goodness.

My whole life I have been training for eating contests, but for me it’s more of a marathon instead of a race. As such, very few contests cater to my abilities. If you know of any contests that allot a lot of time, I am more than ready. Bring it on.

-M

Olympics A-go-go

Hello All,

I thought I’d post on something of which I have little to no knowledge…THE Olympics!!!

The opening ceremony in our apartment was accompanied by a roudy group in costumes (catch pics of my gold medal costume on facebook…more like a gold warrior for America, but still). There was also some homemade woodchip booze, but I can’t say that it really improved the atmosphere.
Canada doesn’t have much of a culture, but the Native American dancers were pretty cool…despite the fact that they might have taken a few steps backward in terms of progressing away from racial stereotypes.
The Wayne-torch situation was just fabulous. What a standout guy to scald is face off in the flames of world unity!
In all of the hub-bub around my apartment, I missed out on the whale scene. Apparently this was the coolest thing that’s ever happened in the history of anything. Or so I’m told.

Despite my best efforts to watch THE Olympics this year, I have failed to catch anything but reruns. It is way less exhilarating to watch Shaun White hit the slopes and hear your friend pipe up, “Here’s where he wins the gold!” C’est la vie.

One thing I have enjoyed this Olympics is to pretend what it would be like if I had absolutely no fear of death. You bet your bum I’d be a ski jumper or skeleton racer.

Cheers USA!

-M