In case you were wondering, these are not my actual tweets. I put little to no thought into my actual tweets and the majority of them aren’t funny, insightful, or interesting. But by all means, follow me on twitter (@madsyjoy) if you want to hear RT from comedians, my tv conquests, and many self-deprecating comments.
How come Lite Ranch tastes like a wonderful summer snack and Fat Free Ranch tastes like the devil’s a$$hole?
“I need a pastry like I need a man.” -one of the best drunken quotes from 2004.
I realize I’m a total n00b, but this blog is make-me-cry funny The Clearly Dope. I spent a solid hour on there today.
I honestly have no idea what “fabric softener” is. It seems like a marketing ploy to me.
My new favorite karaoke song is Zombie, by The Cranberries. Something about getting screamy during karaoke makes me happy.
The majority of our wine rack is 2buckChuck. I must be going through an ironic phase. Time to grow a hipster moustache.
One of my friends only farts in the bathroom. I can’t think of a worse way to live your life.
I frequently think, “I want to nap, but I’m too amped up on caffeine.” #firstworldproblems
What’s your day like in tweets?