Jonathan got the new “Siri” iPhone. The next robot phone to come out will be capable of feeling love.
I almost bought a $250 set of wedding hair pins and then realized they were selling on Etsy for $12. And this is why wedding planning makes you pull your hair out.
I’m going to a taping of Conan tomorrow, and they just happen to have Zach Galifianakis on as a guest. #WINNING
I truly believe Saran Wrap is the source of all evil.
If you don’t already read The Bloggess, you probably should. She saw a Snuffleupagus the other day, and you can’t really beat that blogging material.
The government has a plot against sleep. Need proof? Garbage trucks, construction workers, and Michelle Bachman.
Homemade apple pie is on my fall to-do list, but I’m really hoping somebody else just does it for me. Doesn’t pie taste better when you don’t have to lift a finger for it?
What are your Tweets for today?